<p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??慈善詩會校長:陌上花開</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??總編:牛欄草</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??成聯主編:星輝,綠色的詩,溫酒東籬,沉醉清風,樂水,墨泉,巨寶,同路人</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:星輝 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??美篇編輯:巨寶</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??組稿:溫酒東籬 沉醉清風 樂水牛欄草 綠色的詩 婧翔宇宙 星輝 蘇麻 墨泉……</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"><span class="ql-cursor">?</span></span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">聲明:本聯集已經獲得組稿聯友授權</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">??????????????????????????????</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">【慈善詩會26度聯圃】60期臨屏優聯佳對集。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">本次練習,參賽者有選擇的題聯對句,擇優收錄美篇。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">聯意新穎的成聯針對性個評,另一些出眾成聯無評即評,是希望留有更多空間于讀者鑒賞。</span></p> <p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><br></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><b style="font-size:22px;">?~~~編委聯~~~</b></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">牛欄草</b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">展喉高嶺,不忘老驥一身,舊竹一枝,桑榆雖晚力猶在;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">棄夢繁城,重種菜畦半壟,詩田半畝,歲月從來心未荒。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">星輝</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">紫菊方開,東籬把酒斟秋色;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">丹萸遍插,北嶺登階祝鵠年。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??自評:斟幾盞秋色,遙祝安康。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">綠色的詩</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">丹楓臨水,黃菊倚籬,登樓一醉思鄉曲;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">玉露金風,文星紫氣,望月同吟敬老詩。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:秋色撩人,思鄉敬老,氣象全出。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">溫酒東籬</b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">薄霧疏籬,獨酌重陽寒沁袖;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">清霜瘦影,懷人令節淚欺腮。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:雋永佳句,唇齒沁香。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">沉醉清風</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">辛丑重陽</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">只言秋染菊香,黃櫨似火迎佳節;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">豈料雨侵河漲,洪水如潮襲故園。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:一虛一實,真切可嘆!</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">墨泉</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">登高舉目,霞涂畫景;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">賞菊興懷,詩話重陽。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:簡潔有味,一字千金。</span></p> <p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><br></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><b style="font-size:22px;"><span class="ql-cursor">?</span>~~~優聯~~~</b></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">水墨清芬</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">涼露蒼苔,碧水驚秋,斜陽雁影櫨楓火;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">暮云遠岫,黃花照眼,佳節詩篇翰墨香。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:詩情畫意一副聯。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">望遠欣蔚</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">望不斷雙行旅雁,一抹閑云,翩翩共赴登高處;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">算無休幾縷秋香,半坡菊色,蕩蕩同來把酒時。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:細品極有味道,功夫了得,領字尤贊!</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">李建軍</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">重陽之際觀《長津湖》——</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">拭淚縈懷,萬里青山埋硬骨;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">登高放眼,三杯菊酒祭忠魂。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:硬骨,改鐵骨,結合電影與重陽,不錯。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">繡春刀</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">風力偏狂,笑看吹帽;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">陽光猶媚,醉賞插萸。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:自然有味</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">冰之晶 </b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">登高懷遠,一杯濁酒遙相寄;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">對景添愁,三徑黃花空自吟。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:登高懷遠,雅士孤影自吟。</span></p> <p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><br></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><b style="font-size:22px;"><span class="ql-cursor">?</span>~~~合格聯~~~</b></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">邊緣人類</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">茱萸有寄歸心夢;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">秋月無言客路涼。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:筆法老道,渾然天成。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">亦美</b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">王維佳節吟羈旅;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">清照黃昏嘆菊花。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:詩人入句,更添雅意。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">子墨</b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">邀君共酌茱萸酒;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">賞月同吟墨菊詩。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:飲酒吟詩好雅興。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">胡鷹</b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">登樓縱目,萬里流霞歸我;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">借酒銷愁,半簾鉤月賒君。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:用筆飄逸俊美,題稍偏。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">雪中情</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">九九初臨,千枝媚骨吐霜氣;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">絲絲故入,一寸柔懷牽鶴顏。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:故入可酌。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">風中雨荷</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">秋晚人孤,西風一曲多凄苦;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">山高夢隔,菊酒三杯空念牽。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:孤影涼夢,珍重加衣。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">一粟</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">霜染菊黃,呼朋攜酒登高去;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">風催日短,倚檻思鄉敬老回。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:對仗工整,立意好。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">張嵐</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">金風拂面,玉露凝枝,游子登高庾嶺。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">楓葉流丹,菊花吐艷,椿庭倚望柴門。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:本句自對。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">王巖旭美新華 </b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">重陽節日登高處;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">萬里江山入畫中。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:下比猶好。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">秋葉夏花</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">秋韻千般,萬縷楓姿傾九月,</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">情懷一闕,三杯菊酒醉重陽。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:對仗工整,數詞精巧。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">蘇麻</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">菊桂同馨,呼朋喚友登高去;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">桑榆非晚,得酒題詩對句來。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:對仗工整,有情趣。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">淡墨添香</b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">對酒長吟,籬菊當風香暗度;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">登山遠眺,越椒帶雨果初紅。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:繽紛色彩,呼之欲出。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">王詩媛</b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">重陽</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">葉葉紅霞尚滿天,重陽漫步尋詩意;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">階階黃菊猶盈眼,好景怡情度歲年。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:前后分句缺少變化,有詩味,聯味稍淡。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">金蕊</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">百念動心懷,浮云幾片輕輕繞;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">眾生高目極,晴日千山采采收。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">黃法</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">九九重陽,作賦吟詩需菊酒;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">年年今日,登高賞月在書樓。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">劉寶山</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">陶潛賞菊常酤酒;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">摩詰題詩為憶人。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">大漠胡楊 </b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">賞菊庭前,一片思情飛故里;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">登高嶺上,兩行熱淚落他鄉。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">仗劍天涯</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">賞菊登高君有意;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">題詩把酒我多情。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">陌年微涼</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">霧鎖寒窗,酒醉無眠夜;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">身依冷月,詩懷在外人。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">葉落灼秋</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">九月他鄉猶作客</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">重陽遠處獨登高</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">羅楊莉</b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">賞菊登高尋舊夢;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">題詩把酒解新愁。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">原始森林</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">登山四野楓林艷;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">倚檻千枝菊蕊香。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">青澄</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">東籬載酒迎歸客;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">南雁穿云入好詩。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">云溪</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">重陽望遠登高處;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">萬里懷人飲醉中。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">人生如夢</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">觀楓賞菊登高處;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">觸景生情憶故人。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">晨曦</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">佳節又重陽,攜友登高神奕奕;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">濃情加美酒,吟詩賞菊樂悠悠。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">冷月清秋</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">歲又重陽,慈母回鄉親故舊;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">時將九月,諸兄對酒客京華。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">楓林晚景</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">望遠登高,重陽氣爽深秋意;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">相親敬老,白發神清孝子心。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">夏日風情 </b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">懷舊感新,菊酒濃濃當此日; </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">登高望遠,茱萸艷艷又三秋。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:登高感懷,菊酒遙祝更好</span></p> <p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><br></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><b style="font-size:22px;">?~~~瑕疵聯~~~</b></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">紫嫣</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">采菊踏秋留玉液;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">登山遠眺見瓊枝。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:遠眺與踏秋詞性不對品,遠眺改為眺遠。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">梁師誼友 </b></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">寒露長城,北國千山失綠;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">重陽霜影,南州萬里藏芳。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:長城/霜影欠工,</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">慧心緣</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">秋色漸濃,把酒吟詩楓似火; </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">故人將老,思鄉憶母淚如泉。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:下聯前分句與后分句搭配不妥。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">煙雨江南</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">年年福壽登高處;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">九九重陽憶故人。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:九九重陽意有重復</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">張源</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">九九登高,童趣夢想身姣健;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">萸囊已舊,老叟雄心上頂峰。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:多處詞組結構不一致,詞性不對品。不規則重字,上聯尾句失替。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">李郢</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">登高望遠,茱萸嶺上隨兒慮;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">對景思親,萱草堂前解母憂。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:意好,不符馬蹄格。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">花邊云彩</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">籬邊白菊,佳期怒放重陽意;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">露上丹楓,登高望遠茱萸情。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:菊雅楓艷,恰逢其時。下聯后分句失對。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">東爾君</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">九九歸真呈祥瑞;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">雙雙返璞現安康。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:上聯失替,祥應平</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">娜娜磊</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">雁影歸鄉游子韻</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">重陽賞菊度金秋</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:游子/韻與度/金秋,節奏點不一致</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">潮韻明月</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">一點閑情,步步登高,邀友攜壺共飲吉祥酒;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">幾分雅興,年年攬勝,臨風負手同吟古韻詩。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:意境不錯,吉祥與古韻詞組結構不一致</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><b style="font-size:20px;">婧翔宇宙</b><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">丹楓著艷,蘆葦搖蓬,節令恰逢疏朗好;</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">黃菊吐芬,草花凝露,世間最美是清秋。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">??簡評:后分句多處結構不一致,節奏點不對等。</span></p>
主站蜘蛛池模板:
金昌市|
高陵县|
丰宁|
寿光市|
肇州县|
千阳县|
常山县|
晋城|
武夷山市|
赤城县|
青州市|
鹤山市|
古交市|
莱西市|
剑阁县|
翼城县|
德化县|
上思县|
卓尼县|
乐东|
晋中市|
秦皇岛市|
平陆县|
公主岭市|
万州区|
祁连县|
崇文区|
柏乡县|
舞钢市|
仙游县|
乐清市|
兰溪市|
金华市|
格尔木市|
伽师县|
同江市|
赤城县|
瑞丽市|
苍溪县|
如皋市|
石景山区|